I made an observation today that was kind of interesting. For years, I thought that bravery was something akin to mind over matter. That you could talk yourself out of your fears. Along with some influence or power of persons or things to be a compelling force and produce effects on your actions, behavior or opinions (read 'manipulation'), it is possible to tread where no man dares to tread. I agree that you have to wrap your head around whatever calls for bravery, but I now realize that without passion for your convictions, what may appear as bravery is simply posturing.
It is easy to use your position or role to exhibit bravado or if you are compelled to act on your fears, but without believing with your whole heart that what you need or want to do is something meaningul to you, make a difference in your life or in the lives of others, I believe that your actions are solely for the purpose of perception and nothing more.
The belief part is the impetus of moving ahead, even with the full realization that perhaps your actions may not be perceived as favorable. This should not matter to you when you engage your fear, for you are sure that you have used right thinking in coming to that place where you make your decision. You trust yourself and it is important enough to you that that fear of repercussions is lost from the equation.
If we fear stoking the fires of heaven with coals from hell to start, we cannot experience growth and we will always be afraid. It is said that it is easier to ask for forgiveness, than it is to ask for permission. I believe that to be true, if you have applied right thought and right action before you carry on.
So I wish you all a Brave Heart and a clear conscience. If you live like this, you will move along your path with certainty. After all, we are the guardians of our destinies. We have been given life to learn, give, apply and most of all love. Love above all things.
Well, two days in a row towards developing my blog habit. I'm finding it a remarkable way to catalogue the credos that have developed in my 53 years of walking on this earth. If anyone reads this, my hope for you is that it provided some food for thought. If not, well, at least I had enough heart to put it in print.
Friday, September 17, 2010
Thursday, September 16, 2010
Habits, good and bad
They say that if you do something regularly for 3 weeks it becomes a habit. Take this blog for example...If I blog daily for 3 weeks, then I should not have to remind myself to blog. I mean, truly, this is an exercise to get what is in my head down in interspace, so as to free up and defrag my overloaded thinkster. I am committing to the bandwidth that I will blog daily to create a 'good' habit.
I am compelled to question to myself, as if to validate the theory above about creating good habits, making mental note of the habits I have that I can attribute to self discipline. I've come up with dental hygiene, housecleaning routines, and organization at work. Hmmmmm.....my nose wrinkles, I look up to my right in my thinking pose, and I come to the self-realization that there is still a lot of work to be done as far as the development of 'good' habits.....
Now bad habits, well, that's another story. Case in point: try as I may, I can't seem to stop myself from 'cleaning up' other people's paperwork when I come across it in the house. This is a good/bad habit in my opinion. It is a good habit to clean up a paper trail, cleaning up a paper trail and then having said paper join the land of the lost, not so much. In fact, this habit has been the seed from which 'big trouble' is grown. The kicker is, try as I may to leave the paper trail alone, something subconciously drives me to do away with it and it is a fact that there are times I sincerely do not remember doing this. It is an unconcious response. I find humor in the fact that this unconcious response is the antithesis of how I manage paper trails while at work. In fact, I am known in the building as the 'go-to' person for all things that have gone missing, knowing what drawer or drive, box or bag, corner or can to find it.
So is it possible that bad habits can be broken in three weeks if approached with intention? I suppose I could examine other theories to see what merit that might have, but it may be too late. At the ripe age of 53 I'm afraid I've become conditioned to pick paper up and put it where it can't be found. So, I'll start the process of developing a 'good' habit. If I'm sucessful, I will thank the devil out of Dr. Whothephuq and preach his ethos. As for the flip side of the coin, well, let's just start with the blog!
I am compelled to question to myself, as if to validate the theory above about creating good habits, making mental note of the habits I have that I can attribute to self discipline. I've come up with dental hygiene, housecleaning routines, and organization at work. Hmmmmm.....my nose wrinkles, I look up to my right in my thinking pose, and I come to the self-realization that there is still a lot of work to be done as far as the development of 'good' habits.....
Now bad habits, well, that's another story. Case in point: try as I may, I can't seem to stop myself from 'cleaning up' other people's paperwork when I come across it in the house. This is a good/bad habit in my opinion. It is a good habit to clean up a paper trail, cleaning up a paper trail and then having said paper join the land of the lost, not so much. In fact, this habit has been the seed from which 'big trouble' is grown. The kicker is, try as I may to leave the paper trail alone, something subconciously drives me to do away with it and it is a fact that there are times I sincerely do not remember doing this. It is an unconcious response. I find humor in the fact that this unconcious response is the antithesis of how I manage paper trails while at work. In fact, I am known in the building as the 'go-to' person for all things that have gone missing, knowing what drawer or drive, box or bag, corner or can to find it.
So is it possible that bad habits can be broken in three weeks if approached with intention? I suppose I could examine other theories to see what merit that might have, but it may be too late. At the ripe age of 53 I'm afraid I've become conditioned to pick paper up and put it where it can't be found. So, I'll start the process of developing a 'good' habit. If I'm sucessful, I will thank the devil out of Dr. Whothephuq and preach his ethos. As for the flip side of the coin, well, let's just start with the blog!
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Awareness
I realized some time ago, that we have become a people of convenience; speaking to automatons on the telephone when we want information, (ex. "please press one if you'd like to hear this message in English", "Press two for Customer Service", "Please say yes, or press two if you'd like to make a payment"), communicating online, making purchases on line, viewing the weather on our phones, some even find love never having left their home. We drive to work, we make pit stops on the way home, we are fitting 50 things into our days, only to be left like a wet towel on the floor when hit home, exhausted with little clue as to what all transpired in eight hours.
It's no wonder to me that we choose to go about our business in the most efficient manner without connecting face to face; most of the people I encounter out and about are rude, unfriendly, unhelpful and without the rudimentary knowledge to help me when I've got a question. Case in point, when I went to see a movie the last time, I asked for butter on my popcorn (I know, I know......) and the young woman behind the counter looked at me like she was doing me some huge favor, never stopping her conversation with her coworker while she buttered the outside of the popcorn container and I was now fully informed about how 'Ryan kept texting her last night, and she knew it was just a booty call'.
It's everywhere, the grocery store, the information or manager's counter in most every store, the people that you finally get to speak to on the phone after pushing buttons on the thing for 30 minutes. When did we become the people with no social skills? What happened to saying "Hello" and offering a smile to a stranger or passerby? When did we all agree that it's alright to go to work and showing up was enough to earn your day's pay?
I'm thinking that we haven't become more efficient, just lazy. When I think of all the tasks I complete on the computer at work, all the while thinking I'm saving paper and that is a good thing, I'm printing out copies of this work to share with others. Doesn't seem like I saved paper at all! Don't get me wrong, I'm a geek for the computer, love my gadgets and gizmos, feel lost without my cell phone, but I have to say, I still get warm and fuzzy when a smile is returned, or I've shared an anonymous chuckle over something silly at the store with a stranger. So I ponder how we retain our 'presence' through our automated world, so we don't become a mere pixel in the monitor of our earth.
When we recently traveled to the Keys, I had some time to just 'be'. A time where it was just quiet, no conversation, no radio, TV, facebook......I was surprised to find out how loud life can be when we tune in. I sat there, listeing to the breeze, the sound the water makes when a fish jumps up, the fluttering of a gull's wings and their hysterical laughter. I found myself smiling up at the bird as if we were bound by some earthly joke, the heavens our screen and joy is all around us if we just become quiet enough within ourselves to 'hear' it all.
I've since adopted a practice that I strive for daily. Awareness. It is the place you take yourself when you can finally calm down enough from your day, where you focus on just breathing (because that's what keeps us alive!), and clear your head for just a few moments.....away from the feeling that you absolutely have to redeem your farmville gifts, make a phone call, clean the bathroom, or any other self ordained obligations that all will wait.....while you just live for a few moments. It's really hard to push all thought from your mind, although it's just all that thinking that has taken you to a headache, stress, and wound up tighter than a yo-yo place that feel like crap. When you start to become 'Aware', you quickly realize what things will wait, what your priorities are, what is worth stressing over and what is not. We put too much emphasis on things that make so little difference in who we are and what our purpose is.
Now, I will admit that I am a silly, fun-loving, aging hippy, but my tendencies are to have the most serious of thoughts. I often felt that I needed that goofy piece to temper my thinking or I might as well just lock myself up in the closet. But that exercise in itself can be exhausting. At the age of 53, I have come to realize that there is so much life out there and I want the pieces of it that are mine. Every day of it is a gift. All of it shapes and molds us. Yes, even the bullshit has it's purpose. So, my first blog seems to have become philisophical. I am hoping that someone can identify with these feelings, that you can find a place to be 'aware', and that reading this will save you some years of accumulated stress.......I've already done that for you!
It's no wonder to me that we choose to go about our business in the most efficient manner without connecting face to face; most of the people I encounter out and about are rude, unfriendly, unhelpful and without the rudimentary knowledge to help me when I've got a question. Case in point, when I went to see a movie the last time, I asked for butter on my popcorn (I know, I know......) and the young woman behind the counter looked at me like she was doing me some huge favor, never stopping her conversation with her coworker while she buttered the outside of the popcorn container and I was now fully informed about how 'Ryan kept texting her last night, and she knew it was just a booty call'.
It's everywhere, the grocery store, the information or manager's counter in most every store, the people that you finally get to speak to on the phone after pushing buttons on the thing for 30 minutes. When did we become the people with no social skills? What happened to saying "Hello" and offering a smile to a stranger or passerby? When did we all agree that it's alright to go to work and showing up was enough to earn your day's pay?
I'm thinking that we haven't become more efficient, just lazy. When I think of all the tasks I complete on the computer at work, all the while thinking I'm saving paper and that is a good thing, I'm printing out copies of this work to share with others. Doesn't seem like I saved paper at all! Don't get me wrong, I'm a geek for the computer, love my gadgets and gizmos, feel lost without my cell phone, but I have to say, I still get warm and fuzzy when a smile is returned, or I've shared an anonymous chuckle over something silly at the store with a stranger. So I ponder how we retain our 'presence' through our automated world, so we don't become a mere pixel in the monitor of our earth.
When we recently traveled to the Keys, I had some time to just 'be'. A time where it was just quiet, no conversation, no radio, TV, facebook......I was surprised to find out how loud life can be when we tune in. I sat there, listeing to the breeze, the sound the water makes when a fish jumps up, the fluttering of a gull's wings and their hysterical laughter. I found myself smiling up at the bird as if we were bound by some earthly joke, the heavens our screen and joy is all around us if we just become quiet enough within ourselves to 'hear' it all.
I've since adopted a practice that I strive for daily. Awareness. It is the place you take yourself when you can finally calm down enough from your day, where you focus on just breathing (because that's what keeps us alive!), and clear your head for just a few moments.....away from the feeling that you absolutely have to redeem your farmville gifts, make a phone call, clean the bathroom, or any other self ordained obligations that all will wait.....while you just live for a few moments. It's really hard to push all thought from your mind, although it's just all that thinking that has taken you to a headache, stress, and wound up tighter than a yo-yo place that feel like crap. When you start to become 'Aware', you quickly realize what things will wait, what your priorities are, what is worth stressing over and what is not. We put too much emphasis on things that make so little difference in who we are and what our purpose is.
Now, I will admit that I am a silly, fun-loving, aging hippy, but my tendencies are to have the most serious of thoughts. I often felt that I needed that goofy piece to temper my thinking or I might as well just lock myself up in the closet. But that exercise in itself can be exhausting. At the age of 53, I have come to realize that there is so much life out there and I want the pieces of it that are mine. Every day of it is a gift. All of it shapes and molds us. Yes, even the bullshit has it's purpose. So, my first blog seems to have become philisophical. I am hoping that someone can identify with these feelings, that you can find a place to be 'aware', and that reading this will save you some years of accumulated stress.......I've already done that for you!
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